Pains of Joy.
Again I felt it.
I was going into friendster. No particular purpose. Perhaps it was curiosity. I don't know but I felt like going into friendster. I stop updating it le.
I was looking through Friends tab when I saw My former teacher. Mr Wong Kim Wah James.
What caught my attention was his attempt to look nerdy. I must admit that he did a pretty good job looking nerdy. hahaz. Well. What happen to the above average looking teacher I know? Then I saw the caption. Something about looking nerdy for the children ministry.Hmmmm.
Looking through the photos, I see that he is doing well in church. He entered the children ministry to enjoy his passion teaching. Enjoying his little corner in MOE. I'm proud of him.=)
He photos contained many joys of his life. He is one who strives to make best all situation. He who always try to be happy. Who believes that all thing is possible. Pure essence of masculine humanity.You can see it in his face. Not knowing how to smile but giving the best of effort to smile. I saw his pride and joy of our batch. Tan Shin. Top Scorer of Tanglin. I saw His passion . The military band. I know his love of music. The whole of 4E4 knows his passion. He even own a drum set.I saw his fellowship with fellow ex-students. Saw every thing that clearly represents his joy. I wish him well. May he finds his other part soon. Hahaz.
As I was looking , I felt the familiar pangs in my heart . The pain I felt when I see joy in photographs. The strong feeling loss , depression , yearning , envy , joy pierces my heart. It reminds me clearly of the could be curse I bear. The inability to have to hold on to friends.
The flaw that runs in my blood. Past down from my earthly creator. The same failure that runs in my parents blood runs in my blood. I have never held a friend close for more than 3 years.
The Awful reality bites hard at me. The fallings I see in my parents continues to smudge my life.
The longest must have been Slackerz. 2 Years.
Parasite and Frost are perhaps the longest? Perhaps...3-5 years?
Somewhere there but Parasite's dead for Treason. Shan't go into details. Frost was Banished for her own good.Neither will I go into details on this.
Still ....Well I should learn to cope with all this. No use crying for help when you are invisible right? At least I'm visible to the most important being ever existed. He who sees all and knows all and created all.
Anyway enough of sobbing over spilled sprite.
I manage to Improve my Blogskin on my own!!!!! Without help and it is mostly the vital things! YEah! I was so happy and proud of myself. Thankful to God tooo! I treated myself double dose of Lunch. Wahahhahahaz. Carbonara a kind of Spegetti I guess and a hefty serving of wanton noodles!
Wow. Felt full.
After that however, I felt a little sick...no ...very sick. My stomach feels weird.Kind of like something is moving about inside and I felt like vomiting.Anyway within an hour I recovered but the strain and effort makes me hungry again hahaaz.So I ate my APPLE! I love APPLES!
Went home . There was this girl that kept looking at me. I look back and she turned . Wahahaz.
She was later replaced by another that also kept looking. I know my hair attracts attention but please. I won't Zidane Headbutt you . So don't worry . Blehhh. hahahaz.
Oh ya there was this Indian Guy. Wahahaz. I was at the Lift yesterday with this Indian guy. He said : " Hi , I'm (Something which I failed to remember) . What's your name." I greeted back : " Oh hi! I'm Yu Ki . " Then the lift reaches his level. He
grab my shoulders (Those you do with friends) and said: " nice meeting you" and he went off. I was of course stunned. I voiced out : " you too". And the lift close. This brings me to think about some issues. Indians soft speaking style and constant contact with the people they interact with often makes them look gay. I guess that they are generally nice people hahaz. Just a bit different but I did get a shock. Hahaz.
Anyway I guess That's it for today. I got a feeling that great days are coming by!!!
I'm Hungry. .....Now...where's my mom's dog. Bwahahahahahz