God saves...not me.....
Dark and terrible days lies ahead ...a day forged by sin , selfishness and self-pity.
Hmmm....Supposed to be a happy day ...Going to Australia today after all. I was so happy that I tidied the house , cleaned the hamster cages and the hamsters.The day was so well laid out yesterday.I , as planned went on to watch the movie Era of the Vampires.Well... Mom got home.She bought along uninvited guests.
Well the movie I was excited to watch turned out to be rather stupid...isn't great at all.Bad story line and other than shadows, I saw nothing but shadows ...so dark I can't see anything.This is besides the point.Mom bought home depression and despair. As the pair of Ds danced around the house, Mom tearfully recounted what happened.My uncle was in critical condition in the hospital.He may die anytime....Well I shall give you a brief walkthrough of the events that has passed.
Uncle was getting sicker and sicker....collapsed on many occasions and was discovered by my mom(no one's home)who sent him to hospital.About this time, My uncle had difficulty speaking properly...he slurred in his speech.Mom was angry as no one was there to take care of uncle.Often, she relate to me how useless my cousins(especially the oldest one )were and how they selfishly go on with their fanciful life while no ones home to look after my uncle.She spoke of many occasions that the older one had pushed away responsiblity to look after her dad just to play with her friends even through she is the one her dad loved the most.So my mom took uncle to her care.Uncle's condition continues to worsen.Especially in the night.He will continually eat and go toilet.He was so befuddled at those times that he would get lost in the bedroom looking for the toilet which is in the kitchen.He would also lock himself in the toilet and tried to get out by turning the shower tap.I won't say what happens next.Well yesterday his condition got so bad that mom sent him to the Singapore General Hospital.Doctor later called and told her that Uncle could die anytime...and they should prepare for the worst.....
I was later told that My cousin was in sentosa.....I wonder.... how can she still play so much when her dad is in this condition....and her family is so poor ...where did she get the money?Even I felt like abandoning my Australia trip....Mom told me not to and reassure me that they can handle it.Well.... It is a gloomy day then.
I so much wanted to help...to prevent such a tragedy.... but I am helpless..... I wished my cousin will be more sensible and spent every possible time she has with her dad.Her dad may die anytime now.
I wished people will start doing little things to make each other's life a little easier in this benighted world.For example, Auntie Julia makes the effort to get pastor together offered a visit and to console the family....we should have more people like this
I myself personally wanted to help everyone whos in need but I'm only human ... I make mistakes....at times , makes situations worse.I realised that I cannot help people whio don't help themselves...I'm not God ....Only God can save the ignorant....But the thing is that I've been watching....watching all the time.Saw so much that I knew the pain that is to come.So naturally I tried to help...often without fruit...So I ended up helplessly watching people self-destructing.......It is a sad sad world...I'm just glad that I'm me ...so protected.